It’s so easy to let ourselves submersed in an opaque world. In a comfy environment, with no challenges, where everything is known, the future has no surprises and everything is familiar. With no windows to the outer universe.

Let me tell you a very personal story about bubbles, opaque worlds and how an open window can change a life.

I was born in a small town in Romania. Some would say it’s the poorest in the country. Statistics do not contradict that either.

My parents were middle-class people. Hard working, one single job their entire life at the textile factory in the town. The factory shut down in the early 90’s (after the Revolution) when I was just a kid. Both of them became unemployed. From middle-class, having a decent living, our family plunged into poverty and insecurity of what came next.

I was surrounded by my parents’ love. And they’ve put all their efforts into my education and to provide me with the bare minimum necessities. But with all their love and all their care, they’ve instilled into my head a FEAR. The fear of uncertainty, the fear of unknown and implicitly the fear of not having a stable job. And unconsciously they’ve put into my mind a DREAM. The dream of having a safe, secure job with a stable income.

I was rocking math and I was the best in my class. I loved to read books, study history, solve math problems and play football with all the kids in the neighborhood. Despite our financial issues as a family, I was a really happy kid. Happy days and happy childhood. I was a really happy nerd.

But I had limited knowledge of the world outside of my small town and outside of my network, the people I knew. All role models for me were teachers, doctors, police officers and soldiers. All of them with secure jobs and stable income.

I was in awe with my math teacher and given my passion for the numbers I was seeing myself following a similar career. A stable one, with secure income, one I could be good at and one that would allow me to give something back. I had a DREAM. A dream created in a bubble. I could see my whole life ahead already. And that felt safe.

UNTIL ONE DAY…

I was 18, ready for a lifetime teaching career. I was in my room surrounded by my books, glasses on my nose and the back to the door. Like a real geek. I remember that day so clearly that I could draw any details of the room.

We’ve got a distant relative visiting us. It was the first time I saw that lady. She used to be a teacher but now she traveled the world with her new job. She was telling me stories about a world and a lifestyle that I’ve seen only in the movie. I was fascinated that someone who left from the same small town could live that unknown life to me and have such experiences.

And while she was heading out of my room, she said:

• I see you’re studying. What do you want to pursue as a career?
• I want to be a teacher. A math teacher.
• Why? Do you want to be poor? (In Romania the teachers have always been under paid and the entire educational system underfinanced)
• But I am poor now. Is there anything else I can do with my life given my skills and knowledge?

Finding out what my career aspirations were, she remember with a smile on her face the joy and happiness she felts being surrounded by students. But on the other hand, she wasn’t feeling complete with the road she has taken. That’s wy she made a change and gave up teaching.

If she would be my age, she would take another path and study computers (which was new at that time, especially in post-communist Romania). It would pay well, I could see the world and the brains would be challenged given the technology rapid advances.

I did not have a computer. I knew NOTHING about technology. I was a pen and paper geek. But I wanted to do something special in life. And having a decent living (an aspect I neglected when choosing my dream). And here it was, someone from my outer world penetrating my well-known universe with this new perspective.

I felt my dream breaking and my bubble cracking. Instinctively I was trying to fix my bubble, to protect it and reject this new wild idea. But I was so intrigued by the new prospect, by this opportunity – which seemed so close and at the reach of my hand given my math skills. All I had to do is to embrace a crazy-unkonwn idea, risk and adapt.

After sleepless nights, I talked to my parents who were strongly against something they had no clue about. Actually I had no clue about it either, but at least I heard a story which convinced me I could have a good life (financially at least).

And I know it’s good to listen to your parent. And I did (partially), I’ve got admitted and I followed both Math and Computer Science faculties simultanesouly for a full year. And when I’ve got a job in the second college year, I told my parents I’m giving up Math and focus solely on Computer Science, thus finally bursting my bubble. Best decision I’ve taken by the age of 20.

And here I am today. Still bursting bubbles and still open to the new. Not getting comfortable with where I am and what I do. Always in the search for a new challenge from which I can learn.

I know it’s easy to stay in our comfort zone, in our safe bubble. But what if we embrace the unkown? What if we don’t avoid risks anymore and see them as opportunities? What if learn not be frightened by new perspectives and unlearn our fears? How would our lives change?

Photo: https://cdn2.psychologytoday.com/